Welcome to my blog! I think you can get what it's all about from the title. But to specify... This is a forum to blog about things that actually interest and matter to ME and to like minded assholes, psychos, comedians, douchebags, sadists, jerks, jacka$$es, filanderers, perverts, creepers, ninjas, asians, americans, asian-americans, conspirasizers, comedians, idiots, savants, idiot-savants, a$$hats, $hitheads, shark biters, mother f*ckers, geniuses, adventurers, trifflers and the like. Enjoy!
I was trollin' the interwebs and came across this funny ass Youtube channel. "Jersey Shore" meets "Jackass" is how they describe themselves. Basic premise: a Guido ass couple plays pranks on each other, boyfriend pranks girlfriend, girlfriend gets angry and attempts to one up said boyfriend and vice versa. All the while they are filming the pranks and showing how they set them up.
Some of the pranks seem kinda staged but it's all good, cause the chick is kinda hot and it's a plus that she has a sense of humor and likes to prank. The dude is a total Guido! And Guidos always (see Jersey Shore) make for stupid funny times.
Check out their latest prank. It involves pubes and fake mustaches, hilarity does indeed ensue! Enjoy!
So I've been on Craigslist a lot lately looking for a job, free shit and naked pictures of hot chicks and I've noticed that that place is full of fucking wacky ass characters! I've never really used the site before and it really is a helpful tool to get out information to the masses. But more importantly it is hours, upon hours of comedic genius! After trolling the site for awhile I found this...
Check out the link above. It basically wraps up all the funny ass posts into one "BEST OF" category and they're hand picked by the Craigslist community.
Here's just a sampling of the comedic genius from the 'Best of' Craigslist section:
A friend of mine and I have been having a long-standing argument about whose penis is larger. We've tried having our girlfriends confirm to the other the exact size, but neither one of us buy it. I don't want to see his penis and he doesn't want to see mine. I don't want my girlfriend looking at his penis and he doesn't was his looking at mine.
So... We just need a girl to look at both of our penises (individually) and then to both of our faces say which one is bigger. We can't pay much. $50.
Location: Vancouver
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Hilarious stuff! The best part about it is that theses dudes are so serious about this! The crazy part is that that's just a sampling of all the wacky over the top posts on the site. So, if ever you are bored and surfing the intrawebsnet just remember that Craigslist = Hours of laughs! Enjoy!
I've been saying this for awhile now but to reiterate... Fedor Emelianko is and has been overrated! To be clear I do think that Fedor is probably one of the best Heavyweights in the world and at a time was probably one of the, if not the best fighter in the world (in his Pride days circa 2003-2006). But he hasn't fought any serious top 10 heavyweights in the last 5 years. With his first ever MMA loss, his mystique of being undefeated and unbeatable is now gone. Kind of like When Buster Douglas beat Mike Tyson.
I use this site whenever I miss a fight on PPV or if I want to replay the fight. The site usually gets the fights up pretty quickly after they happen live. You just have to keep checking until they are posted. Check it out!
Fedor seemed like a classy guy in defeat, so I will give him the benefit of the doubt. But he kinda put himself in a bad situation rushing in not once, but twice into possible armbars He showed alot of heart trying to get out of that tight traingle/armbar but to no avail. Plus, anyone can get caught at anytime in MMA and it's not like Werdum is a slouch. Werdum is a BJJ (Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu) WORLD champion and chokes/submissions are his game. Werdum should get some praise for winning this fight cause it wasn't luck that he got that triangle/armbar on so tight. It was skill. So congrats Fabricio Werdum you just beat an MMA legend!
Music videos are a dying art. Yes, an art! In the 80's and 90's music videos were a way for music artists to portray their music onto a live canvas. I personally love watching a great music video. When you watch a great music video you actually get an insight into the thought, emotion, passion and genius that these artists put forth into making not only the video but also the song itself. Since media outlets like MTV, VH1 and the like are no longer strictly about music videos I think that the ART of the music video has now died. So, I'll be blogging some Music Video Flashbacks every now and then just to remind everyone of not only some great music, but some great music videos from the past. Enjoy!
This is a two-for-one deal with some West Coast classics:
This is a fan made Batman short film by Filmmaker Aaron Schoenke that came out a few days ago. Now, before you scoff at this, bear in mind that this guy spent $27,000 dollars of his own money to make this shortfilm. Was it worth it? You be the judge...
Here is the synopsis from their dailymotion site:
When the Joker escapes from Arkham and murders the parents of a young boy, Batman recalls the pain of losing his own parents as a child. He is pushed past his limits to the point where his focus becomes revenge on all who stand in his way, including many of Gotham’s underworld. Finally, Batman is forced to look at the psychological profile of his own mind and accept the consequences of his life to find resolve.
IMO the short film was done very well. The thing that stands out about it is it's grityness. It's not like a studio movie, wherein the director has to please the studio execs and sugarcoat the whole story. I like the realism from this short film it's kinda like in the Nolan directed Batman Begins films, which I think are the best Batman films to date.
The scene locales look authentic and very well put together and they really set the right mood and atmosphere. The actor who played Batman did a good job portraying the Dark Knight (anyone's better than Christian Bale's voice change as the Batman), but the narrations seemed a bit off. Also, the voice overs seemed a little weird mainly with the Joker, Harley Quinn's scene in Arkham and in the bar fight scene. The storyline and action scenes seemed to work well within the movie. But the overall acting seemed a bit inadequate. Nonetheless, its a good watch if you are a Batman fan and have the free time cause it's about 30 mins long.
I'm not sure what to say about this trailer. I'm really big on Zombies and on the RE series of video games and I've played a majority of them starting with the 1st RE all the way up to the latest game RE5. With that being said the RE movies have gotten progressively worse over time. I actually liked the first one that came out. Cause it stayed close to the RE video games' storyline, but it also changed it up with the introduction of the character Alice, whom the next movies and this upcoming movie is based on.
I think maybe the 3D aspect of the film could be interesting. But it can also end up being horrible cause everyone is trying to make 3D movies now! With the big popularity the format has seen in the last year I think a lot of movies are gonna be getting rushed out in the 3D format and the overall quality is going to suffer and that's very unfortunate.
The trailer seems to show a lot of references to the video game Resident Evil 5. So at the very least they are keeping the story close to what the gamers are familiar with. It also helps that they have two hot chicks (Mila Jovavich, Ali Larter) in tight ass leather get-ups sporting big guns and fighting off zombies like crazy!
Hopefully, they don't fuck this one up. Check out the trailer for yourself...
Look, I'm all about rioting and anarchy for hometown love and representing where you are from but c'mon! The Lakers just repeated so it's not like they haven't won a championship before. On top of that the Lakers now have 15 championships! That's a great feat in and of itself. It's not like LA is a championship starved city. They have 10 NBA championships (5 of the Lakers championships were won in Minneapolis), 5 MLB championships and 2 Pro Football Championships (Raiders, Rams).
With all that being said... ACT LIKE YOU'VE BEEN THERE BEFORE!!! Act like you've won a damn ring before. It's not like they were in a drought, or it was a surprise come back from being down 0-3 games and then they won 4 games in a row (ala the 2004 Red Sox). If they did make a miraculous comeback of that sorts than a riot would be all good with me. BUT they didn't so it's just kinda overkill.
Now, don't get me wrong. Not even for a second! I am personally the biggest proponent for rioting in this modern day era. Like back in the day 1992 the Rodney King riots in LA http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1992_Los_Angeles_riots. I understand that cause there was a lot of racial tensions and overtones involved within that situation. We can even go as far back as the Chicago Race Riot's of 1919 wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago_Race_Riot_of_1919. Wherein, people were rioting for real cultural and social reasons. But a riot for one of the most successful professional sports franchises in history, who just won the 2nd of back to back titles is ridiculous and just plain moronic, IMHO. Again, act like you've been there before!
With all of that being said, I can promise you that if my hometown Chargers or Padres ever win a world championship in their respective sports, YOU BEST BELIEVE THAT I AM GOING TO BE THE FIRST ONE RIOTING THE STREETS OF SAN DIEGO!!!! Believe that!!!! You can take that to the bank!!! Cause obviously, WE / I can't act like we've been there before..... because we haven't!!!
I already have my rioting emergency kit (contains: ski mask, gloves, gas mask, fireworks, steel toe boots, rocks, molotov cocktails etc) ready for the future or even for right now. Like this October should the Padres (who btw are playing pretty well right now) win a championship and/or for 2011 if the Chargers win one. Yes, wishful thinking but you can never be too prepared. And if anything I can use the kit for any possible robberies in the future. lol!
Now, before you call me a hypocrite and say that I'm just hating on the Lake Show (even though I clearly am haha), allow me to explain this. As I have stated before I am a big proponent of riots! But riots for a real cause or reason and if I am allowed to speak freely, I'm waiting for the right opportunity, cause, reason and/or championship to start a riot! Unlike L.A., San Diego is a championship starved city. We have no professional championships to boast and we have only gotten close on 2 occasions (1994 Chargers, 1984 Padres). If there is EVER a reason to RIOT it's when your home team has won the FIRST ever championship for your city! We get a free pass cause we cannot act like we've been there before! Cause we obviously have not!
As hypocritical as that sounds it just makes more sense. Think about it, if the Lakers win another one next year and the fans riot again it would be lame. It would just downplay the whole appeal of a riot. Riots would then become meaningless. It would be like after every "W" the fans are gonna go out and riot. hahaha! I'm all for riots, but you gotta pick and choose the right moments and not downplay such a unique and satisfying once in a lifetime event.
So here's looking forward to a future riot on the streets of San Diego. Hope to see you there! I'll be the one with a gas mask throwing molotov cocktails at poor unsuspecting bystanders, shielded riots cops and cops on horses!!! hahahahaha.(I'm just joking!) A man can dream can't he!
Music videos are a dying art. Yes, an art! In the 80's and 90's music videos were a way for music artists to portray their music onto a live canvas. I personally love watching a great music video. When you watch a great music video you actually get an insight into the thought, emotion, passion and genius that these artists put forth into making not only the video but also the song itself. Since media outlets like MTV, VH1 and the like are no longer strictly about music videos I think that the ART of the music video has now died. So, I'll be blogging some Music Video Flashbacks every now and then just to remind everyone of not only some great music, but some great music videos from the past. Enjoy!
I kind of stumbled upon this TV comedy series on accident. While watching Spartacus: Blood and Sand On demand one night I accidentally clicked on Party Down and just decided to go ahead and watch an episode. An episode turned into 2 episodes, 2 episodes turned into 3 episodes and the next thing I knew I had finished half the first season in one sitting.
The show is set in Los Angeles, CA and is about a catering company called Party Down Catering and its employees on the job. The hook of the storyline is that none of them enjoy being caterers and they all have bigger aspirations to become rich and famous actors, comedians and writers in Hollywood. All of them with the exception of the main character Henry who is played by Adam Scott (the asshole brother from Step Brothers):
Henry is a wannabe actor. He's apparently done some bit acting but his claim to fame is having been "that guy in the beer commercial. The one that says, "Are we having fun YET?'" Henry has reluctantly returned to Party Down where he worked years earlier. He is not happy working this job but can't find anything else. - IMDB.
With the catering job being their minimum wage way to pay the bills until they make it big. Their constant underacheiving, laziness, pranks, cussing and general disdain for their boss and job leads them into never-ending hilarious situations.(All of them except their eccentric and over the top success whore of a boss Played by Ken Marino who is the team leader who doesn't know how to lead anyone). Their catering company usually works with Hollywood stars and Hollywood parties. What makes it even harder for the aspiring Hollywood stars is that they are continually put in situations wherein they can try to excel their careers while they should actually be doing their job, catering.
I honestly haven't laughed out loud while watching a TV show in long time, as much as I have laughed while watching this show. The supporting cast of Martin Starr (the guy in knocked up who gets dared to grow out his beard) and Jane Lynch (the wacky over the top older lady in every Judd Apatow movie) is what sets the series into motion. There's also some guest spots by Ken Jeong (Leslie Chao from the Hangover), Jennifer Coolidge, Megan Mullaly and Kristen Bell (Forgetting Sarah Marshall). The Main character Henry is contemplating quitting acting and trying to right his life. But in between his job, prospects, co-workers antics, budding relationship with a co-worker and his bosses never-ending carelessness he gets stuck in the middle of ridiculous sitiuations and hilarity usually ensues! The second season has already started so jump in and watch this smart, over the top, lofty, and hilarious comedy. Oh, yeah. Did I mention that the series is written and produced by the likes of Fred Savage (Kevin Arnold on The Wonder Years) and Paul "Slappa 'Da Bass" Rudd. If that ain't enough for you to watch this series I don't know what is. Well, they do cater a porn awards show and an orgy.... So.... Enjoy!
So it really is happening! Dr. Dre has been keeping us all in anticipation for years since his last album Chronic 2001. Rumors of the album Detox have been swirling around for 10 years and it's good to hear that the wheels are really in motion to make the album happen. I heard that Dre was being interviewed a while back and that he just threw out an invitation to Jay-Z to be apart of the album. Sounds like Jay obliged... take a listen:
The track is still a rough cut so I'm pretty sure they're gonna clean up the track but its good to hear those Dre beats again. The beat is a little spacey and its a short cut of the actual song, with no chorus, but I somehow think that Dre and Jay will find a way to make this track a hit. Hopefully, this is good enough proof that the long awaited and ever-delayed Detox album will be coming out this year. With all of the shitty hip-hop and rap that's been saturating the airwaves lately, I think an album of this caliber is long over due. There's one thing I know for sure... you ain't gonna have Dr. Dre doing some stupid ass dance or yelling some stupid catchy phrase for the masses. Hopefully, Dre's final album can bring us back to the heyday of hip-hop & rap!
Halo: Reach doesn't come out until September 9th, 2010. But Bungie released this trailer today at the E3 Convention in Los Angeles, CA. Here's what Bungie.net had to say about the trailer release:
"Going above and beyond is standard operating procedure for the Spartans of Noble Team, but even they weren’t prepared for Operation Uppercut. Backs against the wall and facing the full might of a merciless Covenant invasion force, Noble Six must rely on his unique skill set and his previous involvement in the UNSC’s top secret Sabre program to launch a last ditch surprise attack against the Covenant fleet in the last place they expect to be met by strong resistance.
Since you weren’t on hand to witness our trailer’s maiden voyage at this year’s E3, we brought back some footage so you can relive the launch sequence. Get prepped. You’re going in hot."
I played the beta on XBOX live about a month ago and the game played very well. I'm looking forward to this sorta prequel to the Halo 3 storyline. Hopefully, the game doesn't end up being way over-hyped like ODST was though. Looking forward to it!
UFC LIVE is coming to SD! I'm excited for this event coming to my hometown! The event was set to take place in Utah. But due to underwhelming ticket sales it was moved to the SD sports Arena. Their loss is our (SD's) gain! Although there aren't many really, really big names on the card there is still some good fights and good fighters to see. Tickets go on sale to the public on Saturday June 19th @ 10 AM.
The main event is gonna be:
Jon "Bones" Jones Vs. Vladimir Matyushenko!
If you don't know who Jon Jones is yet... The dude is a stud! I think he's gonna be the Next Big Thing in the UFC. Check out the video below!
Other fights of note:
Mark "The Filipino Wrecking Machine" Munoz Vs. Yushin Okami - I'm personally routing for the fellow Filipino!
Joe "Daddy" Stevenson Vs. "The Fireball Kid" Takanori Gomi
-GOMI! Are you fucking kidding me! Gomi was sick when he was in Pride! The dude is an MMA legend!
Demarques "Darkness" Johnson Vs. Matt Riddle
-Good fight between up and coming fighters in the UFC.
I'm really looking forward to this event. Hopefully, I can score some tickets and see this thing live! Maybe, I'll see some of you there!
Microsoft showed off it's new incarnation of the XBOX 360 today at the E3 convention in Los Angeles, CA.
"The new box is crazy sexy in glossy black with touch-sensitive buttons, and Microsoft says it's "whisper quiet," with one large fan instead of two -- the new 45nm chipset undoubtedly generates less heat to begin with. On the features front, it's got integrated 2.4GHz 802.11n WiFi, five USB ports, and 250GB of storage..." -Engadget.com http://www.engadget.com/2010/06/14/slim-xbox-360-gets-official-at-299-shipping-today-looks-angul/
Apparently they're ready to ship NOW! I like that they added WiFi directly to the box and that they FINALLY decided to address the Red Ring of Death issue. I don't know if this is enough to just blindly buy one though. Mainly because the features that they added or addressed, I've had to pay up the ass for already (wireless connector, RRoD) and no amount of shiny new gloss and sleek curves is gonna make me spend $300 for something that I already have.
On another note Microsoft also announced that "Project Natal" is now officially called "Kinect".
"No Controllers. Just you.
Kinect brings games and entertainment to life in extraordinary new ways, with full body play. Arms, legs, feet, and hands, with Kinect there are no controllers, just you. It’s so natural, so intuitive that technology evaporates, letting the natural magic in all of us shine through. All you need to do is jump in." -xbox.com
This looks interesting in that it is body recognition software to play XBOX 360 games and kinect navigation as well as xbox voice command. Here's a video from E3 that I found on Youtube. Take a look and tell me what you think.
I don't really follow too much stuff on Twitter. But This is one of the few pages I do follow because its so damn hilarious! Theres a few twitter posts pictured. Take a look.
Basically, this guy Justin is 29 years old and he lives with his 74 year old dad. Who just happens to be awesome! So Justin just posts whatever his dad says on his twitter page. Hilarity ensues!
The page has become so popular, with over a million followers that he wrote a book that has everything his dad says. And the book has been picked up as a T.V. show that will be starring William Shatner as the Dad. With Shatner playing the grumpy, asshole, one liner dropping dad, the show should be hilarious.
Check out the twitter and the website for some good laughs:
This is for all the other video game heads out there. Modern Warfare 2 Resurgence pack is out with a bunch of new maps. This is a cool transition video of all the maps. Looks like someone put a lot of time and effort into this. It came out pretty dope. Enjoy!
This site is hilarious. Basic premise: People post classified ads on various sites like Craigslist. This guy basically writes absurd and ludacris responses to these emails just to fuck with them. This guys sense of humor is so dry and witty and straight forward that most of the unsuspecting people placing these ads think he's serious. Hilarity ensues!
The guy basically took these emails and made them into a book (pictured). But I'd just recommend checking out the site cause it's pretty much the same stuff and to get started check out the "Top Rated" section for the best stuff.
If you haven't caught onto this show yet then you're mosdef missing out! I started watching the show after hearing some good things from some friends and I was definitely not left disappointed
As a sidenote, If you do not have premium cable (HBO, Showtime, Cinemax AKA Skinamax, Starz, etc.) then I highly suggest you subscribe. Well, what are you watiing for? Do it now! I'll wait... Ok, now that thats out of the way, I know that this might sound sad but honestly I think that getting premium cable has been the best thing to happen to me in awhile! I am never bored and with On Demand there is literally never a time that there is nothing to watch. If you know me then you know that I am a huge T.V. and movie buff and watching TV and movies is one of my favorite pastimes.
OK, now back to Spartacus; Blood and Sand. If you liked the movies 300 and Gladiator then you'll most likely get into this show as well. It's kind of in the same vain as those movies storyline wise and actually if you put the movies 300 and Gladiator into a blender I think Spartacus would be what would pour out into you glass in the end.
One of the best things about the show is how they seemingly blend the violence and sex together, but do it in a way that it doesn't seem like a snuff film or a porno. I was actually thinking that they should probably change the series title to: Spartacus: Blood and Sand and Sex because of how much sex and all the beautiful women they show. And there are ALOT of beautiful scantily clad and/or naked women roaming around on the show. Yes, That is Xena: Warrior Princess to the left in the bright red. That gets me to the next part. The casting and the acting of the show is actually really good. With the supporting cast of Lucy Lawless, John Hannah and Viva Bianca being the actors who seem to stand out. Their portrayals of aristocrats during the series time period seem original and is seemingly what keeps the show afloat.
Probably the best and funniest parts of the show, even though it's not at all a comedy, are when they have battles in the gladiator arena. Being that the show is trying to portray the times accurately, I find it hilarious that while gladiators are fighting in the arena, there are also women in the crowd flashing or just standing around butt naked and also people just flat out having sexual relations in the stands in front of other arena goers. The other funny thing about the show is the writing. They use the word "cock" or a reference to it, in almost every other sentence for what reason I don't know, but it's always funny. lol.
Unfortunately, the show is currently on hiatus because the title actor Andy Whitfield, who plays Spartacus was battling cancer early this year. Thankfully though he is now healthy and ready to start filming:
Andy Whitfield is cancer-free -- and ready to get back to work on the Starz TV series. Whitfield, who was diagnosed with Stage 1 non-Hodgkin lymphoma right before filming for Season 2 was set to start, tells Deadline "I’m raring to go” -- and he's already training to get back into shape as the show's title Thracian. Starz shut down filming for the second season while Andy received treatment -- and instead filmed a prequel season focusing on Lucy Lawless and John Hannah 's characters. Whitfield will resume filming in October. -IMDB http://www.imdb.com/news/ni2779134/
I think the prequel with Lawless and Hannah helming the lead roles will do well to inform about the whole history before the arrival of Spartacus.
Overall the shows premise, storyline and acting are all superb and this show looks like it has a lot of staying power. So you might as well start watching it now. So you don't have to get into it like 3-4 seasons in and be weirded out about what's happening like I was when I started and never finished watching Lost. hahaha! Enjoy!
IMDB The Avengers (2012)
I will admit it. I am a nerd and I do enjoy comic book stories. When I heard that an Avengers movie was in the works I kinda scoffed at the notion. Thinking that it would be another watered down interpretation of a comic book storyline (i.e. fantastic four, incredible hulk 'the first one', X2, X3, X-Men Origins: Wolverine, Daredevil, Punisher 'both of them' etc, etc) I changed my mind about the upcoming Avengers movie. The reason I've changed base is because Joss Whedon is set to direct it, as well as write the screenplay. He will also be helping pen the screenplay for the upcoming Captain America: The First Avenger the movie leading up to The Avengers. This bodes well for the stories continuity because Whedon will have his hand in setting up the Avengers team as a whole leading up to the actual Avengers movie.
It also bodes well for the film because Whedon is such a great director, producer, writer and story teller. If you are unfamiliar with Joss Whedon's work heres a few of his more popular series' and movies that he's created:
Dollhouse
Buffy The Vampire Slayer (both the movie and series)
Angel
Toy Story (he helped write the screenplay on the original)
Serenity
Firefly
Titan A.E. (screenplay)
Alien: Resurrection
he's even done episodes of The Office, Glee, Roseanne and Parenthood.
With the T.V. show Firefly and it's accompanyment the movie Serenity being one of my personal favorite shows/storylines created by Whedon, I'm now looking forward to what type of storyarc the movie will lean towards. Also, check out the IMDB link on top and below to see who's attached and who's rumored to be part of this movie. It looks like it could turn out to be a all-star cast for the ages. Now all we gotta do is wait 2 more years for the movie to come out. lol!
You would think that people would be smart enough to know that anything they put on the internet (especially on facebook) is public domain. And maybe, just maybe they shouldn't put private or embarassing things they don't want people to know out there. Unfortunately, 80% of the worlds population is stupid (myself included). Enter FAILBOOK!
For those of you who don't know who Tucker Max is he's a writer, producer and just a general all around asshole. Here's his exploits http://www.tuckermax.com/
His book I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell is one of my favorites and included in the index of his book is his famous drunk scale.
But this is my personal favorite stage of drunkness:
"Tucker Max" is the ultimate drunk stage. Never mind about operating heavy machinery; I have trouble figuring out door knobs. The only benefit is that I don't have to worry about driving because I can't even find my keys. Any of several things can happen at Tucker Max Drunk. I can:
-black out;
-hook up with ugly or fat girls;
-fail to hook up with hot girls because I pass out on them;
-vomit uncontrollably;
-make loud, boisterous, and thoroughly untruthful claims about my achievements;
-commit myself to large and utterly hopeless wagers that I have no way of covering;
-claim to be an renowned expert on things I could not begin to explain when sober;
-start fights with small, defenseless people;
-break things;
-become very angry with inanimate objects, and loudly curse them;
-say anything, no matter how offensive or mean, to anyone, no matter how helpless or undeserving;
-wake up somewhere that I have never seen before, and do not recognize;
-have long and involved conversations over important topics that I have no recollection of the next day
Welcome to my blog 'Shit That Matters To Me'. I think you can get what it's all about from the title. But I just wanted a forum to blog about things that actually interest ME and that you wont normally find on all the other news, blogs and other shitty sites. yes, I'm talking to you Yahoo!, CNN, MSN, AOL, Etc., etc, etc...
